for the good

I've been struggling lately internally with being content.

As I've mentioned on here since we've been in AZ, is that I firmly believe that God lead us here to teach us that God truly is a provider. And when we rely on him, he will provide even if its not the way that we would expect it.

Well I think God's trying to teach us something about what it looks like to try and limit what He can do to provide. Long story short -- we have to move out of the place we live in now at the end of the month, a family has stepped up and offered us free housing but its really far from the church and a pretty good road trip for Candice to be able to drive to work everyday too. We have a place lined up to live -- but we'll be spending a large portion of our budget on gas costs now. I realize that God is providing a place for us to live...but it's hard to see ahead as to how we'll make it. Without doing some radical changes to our budget...or unless more support starts coming in. Why am I struggling to be content with what God is providing for us? I think I'm just making excuses for my own comfort and convenience. Plus, I think my pride is playing way too big of a factor into this. I want to be a good husband and provide for my wife...but I want to try to submit to God and what he's providing for us.

I don't even know if this makes any sense...but I've been wrestling a lot with it lately.

In the wake of this...Paul's words from Romans 8:28 have been coming up a lot lately. "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, and who have been called according to His purpose."

Whether it be in my own issues with being content, in times of feeling discouraged, or getting to know a 15-year old girl from our ministry who has been diagnosed with stage 4 bone cancer...I know that God is at work through all of this...and He is going to be glorified through all of this.

No matter where we are, or what we are doing...I want to be able to radiate God's love and redemption into everything we do by knowing that whatever happens, God is working in the midst of it for good -- His good. I just want to be a vessel.

(p.s. - please don't mistake any of my thoughts above as a roundabout plea for more financial support. i'm just trying to be transparent here...but if you'd want to partner with our ministry here in AZ...please contact me...i'd love to share with you more.)